Love story part 3:Jesse

The Heart Breaker
I had was on my way for an interview at Fred Astaire dance studios. That was when I first saw him. He was gorgeous. His hair was nicely don’t he had on a pair of fitted dress slacks and a nice button up shirt that was a couple buttons undone. He spent the interview talking to me in a casual normal voice explaining things but stumbling a bit. I kept a strong contact with him to show my interest…in what he was saying…lol.. he was funny and kind and after asking and answering my questions he took me out on the dance floor to try some steps. I must say I was definitely a bit flustered because as if his looks were not perfect enough but then he can move his body better then I have EVER seen a man move. His shoulders and arms strong and his hips that would roll with each note the song played. I was speechless and a bit clumsy because it was hard to concentrate. I had already known I got the job because the owner of the place was brothers with my mom’s best friend/ my sisters godmother. That was who told me to go there in the first place because of my love for dance. After my interview I came in every day during the summer for training with different employees that were not teaching. I made sure to always look my best and try my hardest to dance up to par. It had never crossed my mind that Jesse would like me although I would flirt often and pay close attention to him during staff meetings. It was harmless flirting and I was never about to fool myself that it could be more. I mean I came to find out that Jesse along with the daughter of the guy my mom knew (her name is Jackie) were the REAL owners of that studio and the guy my mom knew was owner of the franchise for the Illinois region. In other words Jesse was my boss. He was an incredible dance / dance partner to Jackie(who had been dancing and wining title since she was 4). He had been on dancing with the stars, and he was 29 years old. What the hell would he see in me? He would never look past the 10year age difference even though to me age is a number. Not to mention the fact that he once dated Jackie until she cheated on him with his younger brother who was another great dance instructor at their studio. Well he ended up SOMEHOW liking me..He text me one night that went something like this…”you like me don’t you” me “umm why do you ask” “this is bad we cant” me” what are you talking about can’t what” “I mean I want to “ me “ ok then do it” “then how about we meet up sometime maybe for a movie or something” me “ ok well let me know”…… I was in shock this whole convo happened at like 3am and I was floating to the thought that the one man I thought would never take a second glance at me just asked me out…and out of NOWHERE!..well we met up that weekend after work which was like 11pm. I ran home to put on a cute dress and get all dolled up. He came to the door all dressed nice and we sat at this bar/restaurant and talked. He was so uncomfortably shy and I was confidently outgoing it was so strange. I felt so in control. The end of the night he took me out of the car and we talked and walked around my neighborhood. Finally upon leaving he walked me to the door and kissed me. Our kiss was soooo perfectly blended, You know when you just kiss someone and it worked so nicely it was like no one had to try and yet it was so passionate. Well Jesse and I fell for each other we started off keep it a secret from everyone and meeting after work in the parking lot of a near by restaurant or whatever just to give each other a kiss and hug that filled the whole rest of the work day with tension until that moment. He formally asked me out and I exactly accepted. We had SOOOOOOO many good times together and a most unforgettable fourth of July! Finally he told Jackie and the owners after we were seeing each other for 1 month and are serious. Well the work tension got almost unbearable but the way we felt had no limits and we were both willing to fight …and we did. I was the MOST MOST romantic guy ever! I mean jerry was the most chivalrous and passionate but Jesse was just a romancer. He was an artist which made it even better when he romanced me. He not only could dance but he played the guitar and sang/wrote his own music (one song that was for me), He was a painter and one day took head shots of me and eventually painted my portrait. He had always just painted the women in his head but hew wanted to try to do one from a real photo. (I was the first) . He would come home from big dance competitions early to come see me and take me out to dinner. For example one night he called me at like 9pm unexpectedly and tyo me to hurry to get dressed he is taking me out and he is coming straight from the airport. He came to my door with 2 roses in his hand and all dressed up and handsome. Then he took me to pete millers steak house to eat and for dessert ordered every one of the desserts. Things like that. He lived in lidenherst which was by Wisconsin and I would drive an hour there to stay with him and then an hour back home for work. He would light candles and music the whole bit. He was the one to ask to meet my family too! SO my mom invited him for dinner. He came with me to both of my sisters weddings and I can honestly say that I could have married him. He was in everyway the man that I could see being happy with and kids and all. I was with him for almost a year which is not THAT long I mean I had been in longer relationships but its just one of those things that you can just feel it. I would drive with him to Wisconsin to meet his family and go with him to his Sunday mass. We were wonderful , he was wonderful..until it all went to shit. His dad had been sick of 14years from a liver transplant and his dad was hitting his worse time yet. I had seen him get progressively worse as we would visit to the point that the last time we went to visit his dad could not go to the bathroom or sit up in bed or even eat. That was such a depressing visit. Jesse was a mess I cried in the backyard with his guitar as I tended to his father and then went out to comfort him. I was ALWAYS understanding and his rock when he needed me. Well Jesse became more distant and on a wed called me over. I had already knew that this was the break up but he insisted that I come over anyway. SO I did and he felt guilty saying that I’m more into now then I is because he is not the same person anymore and I deserve better. Blah blah and then he got all upset and said I didn’t want to do this because he was afraid I would stop talking to him, and I told him im not a child and I will not react like that, then I got to talking about his dad. He drank a FULL bottle of black label and I was afraid he was going to over do it to the point that he would die or get seriously ill so I forced him to stop (he had been drinking heavily a lot). I through all the drinks into the sink and helped drag him upstairs into his bed. ( at this point he sold his house and moved into an apartment that was 5min from where I lived. I pulled him into bed heartbroken but suffocating my personal feeling to tend to his needs. He was talking nonsense and I rub his back until he fell asleep. I stayed up all night with tears in my eyes and pain in my heart for I had realized that my vision of happiness would end when I walked out and close the door. I looked around the room at the easel I had spent $300 dollars on as part of his xmas gift with my portrait still being colored in. I thought about all the wonderful times at his old house…breakfast in bed ,barbeques just me and him, movies, talks, his playing the guitar, our slow dances..just everything and even now talking about it makes my eyes water. I could not believe that all that we had built for 10mnths was about to end. I will never to this day know what might have been. Well at about 8am and still awake I knew he was sound asleep so I slide his head off my chest and onto a pillow gave him a soft final kiss and whispered goodbye with one more long glance at the man that might have been. He will never know any of that happened it will just be another moment locked into my heart His dad died 3 days later and he called my the morning of. I was not only in shock with the news but in shock the he called me..we had not spoken since that night and I was happy that in such a trying time he would ask me to be there. My father died so I related to his emotions. Well anyways after everything he kept me hanging on a prayer of getting back together for 2 months ( that was our song “hanging on a prayer” bon Jovi..it was his idea)He would say he was depressed and lonely I would come over to the rescue and we would 4/5 of the times make love. If you did catch the hint..he was using me so finally I promised myself I would keep faith until the date of what would have been our year anniversary and if we were still the same I would just befriends. (I knew that he knew our anniversary because when we first started dating he gave me 6dozen roses on our 2month anniversary and I didn’t even know that was the date haha) 2 months later things didn’t change and so I told him that we would just be friends and his reply “ I will always love you” UGHHHHHHH…Well this story is already way longer then I wanted it to be and I left a lot out so ill get to the point..eventually I found out that during our last couple weeks she had cheated on me…with a virgin who worked in our industry. I was sooooooooooo pained you have no idea. All that love bullshit and he was just using me? After all that I did and gave to him. I was not clingy or needy or distant or anything. I was just loving, caring and passionate. HOW can you do that to someone ?? How can you hurt the one girl who never hurt you , who helped you in the most trying time of your life!! She told me he lit candles and played her a song and then he told her how hurt he was about his father so she believed he was sincere. DO you believe that crap….I kept it a secret for 8 months and just recently told him I know. He said a bunch of crap about how he didn’t want to hurt me but that he is not the say when he was with me I had all of him and all of him is not here anymore etc…Jesse broke my heart and since then I have been single for the past 9months…waiting to find the one man who will remind me how to love….Whether I find this man or not, telenovelas are my outlet to make me feel the love that I am lacking within my personal life kind of like temporarily filling the void with great stories of true love.